And The Winner Is...

Well, we have another year of the Oscars under our belts. I think the entertainment industry pats themselves on the back more than any other workers on the planet! We have the Emmys, the Grammy's, the Tony's, the People's Choice Awards, the Golden Globes....and I could go on! Wouldn't it be nice if there were an awards show for the common working person? What if we had an Oscar equivalent for those folks who quietly trundle off to work each day and never receive recognition for the fine services they perform? I'm talking about the your normal, average, everyday Joe. The local grocery store checker, fast food workers over the age of 30, landscapers, ditch diggers, sewer workers, for heaven sake!

I think the statuette would bear the likeness of oh, say.....Rosie the Riveter!

Yes! (I think the brown bag lunch sandwich stuck in her hand gives her a true "average working person" image, don't you?) There would be several categories to represent all the different trades - One for Plumbers, Electricians, Beauticians, Builders, loggers, miners, and such. Nominations would come from co-workers and would be forwarded to Price Waterhouse (or whoever it is that guards the results) for tallying. Nominations would have to be based on some outstanding thing the worker did, for instance: "I am writing this to nominate my co-worker, Joe Jones. Joe is truly outstanding in the field of knot-knocking. He holds the record here at XYZ Logging for knocking more knots in one day than anyone else in the company. He goes about his task with unrivaled enthusiasm and is an inspiration to all of us less-tenured knot-knocking folks".

The awards would be presented once a year on Labor Day. The AFL-CIO and other labor organizations would sponsor the entire program. We could hold it in a huge bar, like Gilly's. We would have a red-carpeted runway, just as they do at the Oscars. All of the nominees would arrive and walk the red carpet. It would be a huge media event. Reporters would stop the nominees as they slowly made their way in to the building... "Bob, I've just received word that Joe Smith has arrived....Mr. Smith! Mr. Smith, can you talk to us for a moment? You are up for an award in the category of best Honey Bucket Hauler of the Year. Can you tell us how you're feeling this evening?" "Why sure, Jennifer. I'm very humbled and excited to be nominated this year in a category with many other fine performers. 2008 WAS an Olympic year, you know!" "Well thank you Joe, for your comments and by the way, who are you wearing this evening?" "Jennifer, I'm wearing my favorite designer, CARHART. Their fashions are so versatile - durable and yet attractive enough to wear to this prestigious event". "Well Joe, you look wonderful...Have a good time tonight!" "I plan to, Jennifer...I'm going to check out that bull!"

Once the nominees have entered the facility, the program would begin. It would start with a video on the big screen, featuring a wide variety of trades and professions with workers actively carrying out their tasks. The orchestra would play an inspiring medley of labor tunes, including "Workin' 9 to 5, Workin' In A Coal Mine", "I've Been Workin' on the Railroad", and "Workin' My Way Back to You, Babe. Professional dancers, costumed as representative workers, would bounce their way around stage. And then the awards would get underway, televised via satellite to all the nations of the world....

"And the Rosie for Best Dishwasher in a Privately-Owned Restaurant goes to...."

The top prize of the evening would be "Outstanding Worker of the Year" and would be given to the worker whose performance at their job outshone all of the other workers in all the other fields of endeavor. Not only would this deserving individual win the "Rosie" for best performance, they would also be awarded with a 1 year sabbatical from work, with pay! Or, in the present economy, they would be awarded A JOB in their own chosen field. What drama! What excitement! I can hear the job interviews now....

"I see here that you were nominated for a Rosie in 2009." "Yes sir." "For what category?" "Best supporting mucker in a privately-owned mine". "Well Johnson, say no more! Welcome to the company!"

The whole production would end with a moving rendition of "Look for the Union Label". The best part of this whole thing would be that no one would have to leave to attend the parties. THE party would be right there at Gilly's, and what a party it would be!

Yep, it's quite a concept, and one I believe deserves more looking into.