Disgruntled Customer

I have been a TV cable customer of yours since before you owned the company, and I have NEVER, to my knowledge, been late with a monthly payment. I began paying my bill online last summer sometime and never had a problem with it until NOW. On February 8, I paid my bill online as usual, but evidently accidentally entered a wrong number for my bank account. Because of this, I was notified on February 25, 2009, by telephone, that I was in jeopardy of losing service! NO inquiries, no prior notification from you that there was a problem. On February 26, 2009, we hand-walked a check into your local office, in the amount of $98.00, to cover the cost of the monthly payment of $73.23, plus a $25.00 fee for the mistake. Now today, TWO days later, I get notification that I owe you money again and that it is due ON RECEIPT! I would accept this as a matter of "the bill was issued before we received your payment, tee-hee, just ignore this", but this time, I think not! I can swallow my pride, accept my mistake and move on, but I am NOT going to make amends by paying you EVERY TWO DAYS!

One month ago, ONLY AFTER MY HUSBAND'S INQUIRY, we discovered that we had been OVERPAYING for services by not bundling! NO one ever made us aware that this was an option. We've had internet and TV through you since the company was USA MEDIA(CHECK MY EMAIL ADDRESS). HOW ABOUT A LITTLE CUSTOMER SERVICE, PEOPLE? We have been loyal customers, even after several of our neighbors went to satellite service due to the lousy reception we get from you. When we FINALLY learned of this option (only after my husband inquired as to why our bill kept increasing), we were given a credit, making Feb's amount $73.23, which is the amount I paid on Feb 8th, EIGHT DAYS BEFORE IT WAS DUE. Given the fact that I've been a customer from the time you offered 3 channels and a test pattern, when the error I made was discovered, COULD ONE OF YOU FINE FOLKS NOT HAVE CALLED OR EMAILED ME TO LET ME KNOW OF MY ERROR, GIVING ME THE CHANCE TO CORRECT IT? Instead, I get a phone call saying I'M GOING TO HAVE MY SERVICE INTERRUPTED unless I pay up right away, AND NOT JUST THE PAYMENT AMOUNT, BUT ALSO A $25.00 fee for a simple entering error I made while paying my bill online, effectively erasing the "credit" we were to receive for bundling our services (how convenient!). And do NOT suggest to me that signing up for automatic bill pay would have alleviated this problem. I do NOT trust your business enough to allow you to automatically withdraw money from my bank account!

By the way, thanks to your "quality" service, I had to watch the Super Bowl via a live feed from CANADA!! You may be interested in learning that Canadians evidently aren’t entertained by SUPER BOWL COMMERCIALS, and as a result, we didn't get to watch them either (so much for the damn 3D glasses!) If you're going to use the excuse that Canada's feed got in there for some unknown reason, HOW DO YOU EXPECT US TO TRUST YOU WITH OUR INTERNET SERVICES? For all I know, someone's hacking into my computer as I write this!
Have you noticed yet that I a currently COMPLETELY DISSATISFIED WITH YOUR SERVICE?
In summary, I will pay my cable bill WHEN IT BECOMES DUE ON THE 16TH OF THE MONTH. As far as your current bill to me in the amount of $189.00, well, you know what you can do with THAT. Finally, if you cannot show me some better reception and CUSTOMER SERVICE instead of making me feel like a scam artist as a result of an innocent mistake, I will take my business elsewhere, just as several of my friends and neighbors have already done. By the way, you really should let the folks in your Osburn office run your business for you. It is evident that THEY care a little bit more about having our business than you do!

Have a nice day!

My Baby Girl

(Another meandering from the past...)

Let me tell you something about the birth of my daughter: When I discovered I was pregnant with her, my first thought was "I'm starting all over again". I had 2 sweet boys, and had just gotten my 2nd son out of diapers. I wasn't sure I was up to the challenge, but I was excited about having another child. I REALLY, REALLY hoped that I would have a girl. In 1978, pregnancy had not yet become so clinical - We didn't know the sex of our babies until they were born, unless there was some kind of problem. I wanted a girl so badly that I became very superstitious. I refused to buy anything "girly", for fear I would "jinx" the chance of having a girl. Girls didn't exactly run in my family! The day finally arrived when she was born. It was SOOO different than the boys. The doctors kept insisting I was not in labor. Well, it sure felt like labor, but I trusted doctors to know what they're doing, so I just layed there, reading my book "The Endless Steppe". And it wasn't until the night nurse came in and checked me that I knew I wasn't having phantom pains..."you're going to have that baby in this bed!", she said. And then, she was born....Black hair (that immediately went away), the bluest blue eyes....And a GIRL! I was in heaven! I couldn't believe it was true! And boy, did I want a cheeseburger!! My husband came in and with a smirk said, "You always get your way, don't you?" He thought it might be fun to have "My 3 sons", but HA-HA-HA! I had my baby girl! And all was right with the world! On August 1st, a Tuesday night, 7pm, my life changed forever. My best friend, my buddy had been born! Evidently, her father came to grips with the fact that she was a girl, or else he was just giving me grief about "My 3 Sons", because the day we brought her home, he went straight to town and bought almost every baby dress he could get his hands on! And there were some adorable dresses, too! And thus began the life of my daughter. My precious, sweet, punkin heart. She's grown now, with a sweet little child of her own, but those 1st moments are ones I'll cherish forever!

Goliath!

Meet the newest member of the family!

We just got Goliath tonight. He's the cutest little thing you ever saw. You may think he's a puppy, but he's 2 years old! So far, he and Brodie seem to be getting along fine. Goliath is part chihuahua and part Jack Russell terrier (don't ask me - I don't know!). Brodie is Kelly's boy, but Goliath is going to be muddah's baby. I love him already!!

And The Winner Is...

Well, we have another year of the Oscars under our belts. I think the entertainment industry pats themselves on the back more than any other workers on the planet! We have the Emmys, the Grammy's, the Tony's, the People's Choice Awards, the Golden Globes....and I could go on! Wouldn't it be nice if there were an awards show for the common working person? What if we had an Oscar equivalent for those folks who quietly trundle off to work each day and never receive recognition for the fine services they perform? I'm talking about the your normal, average, everyday Joe. The local grocery store checker, fast food workers over the age of 30, landscapers, ditch diggers, sewer workers, for heaven sake!

I think the statuette would bear the likeness of oh, say.....Rosie the Riveter!

Yes! (I think the brown bag lunch sandwich stuck in her hand gives her a true "average working person" image, don't you?) There would be several categories to represent all the different trades - One for Plumbers, Electricians, Beauticians, Builders, loggers, miners, and such. Nominations would come from co-workers and would be forwarded to Price Waterhouse (or whoever it is that guards the results) for tallying. Nominations would have to be based on some outstanding thing the worker did, for instance: "I am writing this to nominate my co-worker, Joe Jones. Joe is truly outstanding in the field of knot-knocking. He holds the record here at XYZ Logging for knocking more knots in one day than anyone else in the company. He goes about his task with unrivaled enthusiasm and is an inspiration to all of us less-tenured knot-knocking folks".

The awards would be presented once a year on Labor Day. The AFL-CIO and other labor organizations would sponsor the entire program. We could hold it in a huge bar, like Gilly's. We would have a red-carpeted runway, just as they do at the Oscars. All of the nominees would arrive and walk the red carpet. It would be a huge media event. Reporters would stop the nominees as they slowly made their way in to the building... "Bob, I've just received word that Joe Smith has arrived....Mr. Smith! Mr. Smith, can you talk to us for a moment? You are up for an award in the category of best Honey Bucket Hauler of the Year. Can you tell us how you're feeling this evening?" "Why sure, Jennifer. I'm very humbled and excited to be nominated this year in a category with many other fine performers. 2008 WAS an Olympic year, you know!" "Well thank you Joe, for your comments and by the way, who are you wearing this evening?" "Jennifer, I'm wearing my favorite designer, CARHART. Their fashions are so versatile - durable and yet attractive enough to wear to this prestigious event". "Well Joe, you look wonderful...Have a good time tonight!" "I plan to, Jennifer...I'm going to check out that bull!"

Once the nominees have entered the facility, the program would begin. It would start with a video on the big screen, featuring a wide variety of trades and professions with workers actively carrying out their tasks. The orchestra would play an inspiring medley of labor tunes, including "Workin' 9 to 5, Workin' In A Coal Mine", "I've Been Workin' on the Railroad", and "Workin' My Way Back to You, Babe. Professional dancers, costumed as representative workers, would bounce their way around stage. And then the awards would get underway, televised via satellite to all the nations of the world....

"And the Rosie for Best Dishwasher in a Privately-Owned Restaurant goes to...."

The top prize of the evening would be "Outstanding Worker of the Year" and would be given to the worker whose performance at their job outshone all of the other workers in all the other fields of endeavor. Not only would this deserving individual win the "Rosie" for best performance, they would also be awarded with a 1 year sabbatical from work, with pay! Or, in the present economy, they would be awarded A JOB in their own chosen field. What drama! What excitement! I can hear the job interviews now....

"I see here that you were nominated for a Rosie in 2009." "Yes sir." "For what category?" "Best supporting mucker in a privately-owned mine". "Well Johnson, say no more! Welcome to the company!"

The whole production would end with a moving rendition of "Look for the Union Label". The best part of this whole thing would be that no one would have to leave to attend the parties. THE party would be right there at Gilly's, and what a party it would be!

Yep, it's quite a concept, and one I believe deserves more looking into.

The "Crapfty" Crocheter

I've neglected my blog a lot lately. I know you've noticed. I've been busy completing another project.

I am not a crocheter, but for some reason when a baby comes along, my crochet craving kicks in big time! When I was pregnant with Josh, I was certain he was going to be a girl, so I decided to crochet him a dress. Mind you, I had never crocheted a thing in my life, but I was going to crochet him a dress anyway! So, I got a couple of "teach yourself to crochet" books, picked out a pattern I liked, got some soft pink baby yarn, scarfed a couple of my grandma's crochet needles, and began to crochet. It was quite an undertaking. The dress itself consisted primarily of a kind of shell stitch. I was surprised at how quickly I picked it up. Before I knew it, little Joshie had a beautiful, little pink dress! Of course, when he was born and I learned I had a boy, the dress was immediately relegated to the back of my closet. Once in a great while I'd drag it out to show a friend. Sometimes I just pulled it out to look at when I needed an ego boost. Although I had 2 boys, I clung to that dress and drug it all over the world with me. I was so proud of that dress! I don't have a picture of it, but it looked like this:

With 2 little boys to care for, my crochet time pretty much disappeared, and I really wasn't motivated to crochet a pair of tuffskins for my boys. When my little girl arrived, I spent more time sewing her dresses (I decided that my little girl could not grow up without having an aproned pinafore). The crocheting definitely went by the wayside.

Thirty two years passed by with nary a stitch crocheted by me. Then I learned that my daughter AND my daughter-in-law were pregnant and BANG! - The crochet bug hit me again! I decided that I would crochet each of my forthcoming grandchildren an heirloom afghan, and crochet them I did! A blue one for Carson and a white one for Maris (because we didn't know whether Maris would be Maris or Gehrig until she was born). Again the hooks came out and I enjoyed constructing the blankets for the babies. And they came out pretty darn good, thank you!

Nearly 5 years passed. The crochet needles were getting dusty! And then, it happened! YAY!! Sweet little Sophie was born! It didn't occur to me at first to crochet a blanket for Sophie. She was so tiny when she was born, I thought I'd wait awhile before I bought her any clothes. And then it hit me! Good grief! How could I NOT bless my new little grand-Sticks (her nickname - READ MY BLOG!! KEEP UP!!) with one of my priceless afghans?? Why, when she gets a little older, she'll think her maw-maw didn't love her enough to crochet her a blanky of her own!! So, I set out to find a beautiful, one-of-a-kind afghan to crochet for Sophie. Of course, she's already here, but with my fine skills and natural talent, I could whip it out in no time!

I found a pattern I thought was perfect. It had little hearts all the way around it, and in the middle, it was PERSONALIZED with her own little name. I bought the yarn and dove right in. Now mind you, I had never crocheted with 2 different colors before, but again, with my God-given ability to crochet these masterpieces, I was certain I could do it. And I finished the border in record time! But the personalized mat?? Now THAT was a different matter. I stitched and ripped that thing out no less than 3 times!! And learning to crochet with 2 colors?? FORGET IT!! This stinks! You can't imagine how many nights I spent on the internet, searching for instructions on crocheting with 2 colors of yarn!! And when I did find the instructions, I could not seem to fathom what they meant! How do you get the name all on one side?? Aren't you going to have hanging threads or knots or SOMETHING hanging out all over the place?? I even took it to work to ask a crocheting co-worker what crocheter from HELL invented this technique!! Finally, I found some instructions I could actually follow - I think I found them on the "teach your 4 -year-old to crochet" website. Anyway, I finally got it done. And so here it is.....the finished MASTERPIECE -

wow. In my defense, the 'S' looks more like an 'S' in real life than it does in this picture! Trust me!! But this picture is evidence that my "natural" crocheting talent evidently walked out the door with my youth! Nobody told me that my wonderful crocheting talent would be lost with menopause...Funny, too, because most women come into their greatest crocheting years after they become grandmas. I mean, look at that inner border! I must have gone into overdrive up there in the top right corner. There are like 5 extra rows of stitches right there! And midway down the left side of the border....What, is the blanket HEALING itself??

Oh well, I'll still box it up and mail it to Sophie, such as it is. Hopefully, she'll see the love and effort that went into the making of her blanket and not the imperfection! And by the way, I am NOT letting this crocheting thing get the better of me!! Oh, no! I'm going to keep on crocheting until my afghans come out looking as beautiful and perfect as that little dress I crocheted all those years ago. So MAMAS, HIDE YOUR BABIES!! I'm starting an angel afghan as we speak!

Maris, Say Cheese!!

This is a video my son took of my granddaughter Maris some time ago. It has always been one of my favorites. I don't know what's funnier - Her little face or her daddy's laughter! Take a look...

An Unannounced Trip in the Wayback Machine

There I was in deep thought, writing a determination after completing an in-depth investigation of a wage dispute. Just as I was entering the Conclusions of Law, it happened. It started slowly at first, back in the deep dark recesses of my cultured mind. I don't think I was wholly aware of it when it started, but it persisted until I realized it was there. "Da-dum-dum, Da-dum-dum, Da-dum-dum, Da-dum-dum, da-dum-dum-dum-duh, da-dummmm". What is that? It's familiar, and yet...I just can't place it! Before I knew it, I was following the song through my head....."Da-dum-dum, Da-dum-dum, Da-dum-dum, Da-dum-dum....THE MILTON THE MONSTER SHOW!??? WHAAAA???? What the.....? It was actually rather startling - Was it really the tune to the Milton the Monster Show?? I got up from my desk, walked to the back of the office and out the door. Clearly aware of it now, I sang it again in my head...Yes, it was indeed the theme song of Milton the Monster! What the heck?? WHY would THAT song come floating through the memory banks of my mind and into my front line of thought while I was attempting to retrieve a section of State code? Another case of my right-brain, butting-in and taking over again! Another instance of the Id taking over the Ego. I had no choice but to go with it.... (If your in the mood for a little brain-tarnishing, be my guest!)

I was quite the connoisseur of cartoons when I was a kid. Milton the Monster was NOT one of my favorites. Why didn't the theme to Beanie and Cecil, Deputy Dawg or my all-time favorite, Bullwinkle and Rocky, filter back? I began to ponder this strange occurrence, and before I knew it, I was on a spree of remembrance.

Remember Felix the Cat? He was a wonderful, wonderful cat. Whenever he'd get in a fix, he'd reach right into his bag of tricks. The song promised that you'd laugh so hard, your sides would ache, your heart would go pitter-pat, watching Felix, the wonderful cat. I thought they were saying you'd laugh so hard so sides would ache, your heart would go flim-a-flam. What's the use of watching a cartoon if your heart didn't go flim-a-flam? I figured my heart was already going pitter-pat. I wanted action! I wanted adventure! I wanted that bag of tricks, I can tell you that!

Another cartoon show I loved when I was little was The Dick Tracy Show. It came on just as I got home from school in the 2nd grade. The intro was fast-moving and action packed. In one sequence, it showed Dick screaming around a corner in his squad car. The criminal in the back peered out the window and his eyes grew to big, pulsing saucers as Dick made the turn. I felt for that guy, as there were several occasions at that age when my eyes did that as I was riding through town with my teenage brother. It happened to me again when I was riding with my son Josh as he was learning to drive (not to mention my heart going flim-a-flam!)

The show had a great group of criminals, such as Prune Face and Itchy, Flat-Top and B-B Eyes, and Mumbles. Dick also had his colleagues, including Joe Jitzu, Hemlock Holmes and Heap O'Calorie. Although Dick Tracy was often pre-empted by American Bandstand when my brother got home from school, I still enjoyed watching every snippet I could. That was one cool show...

Sometimes, the best cartoons did not garner top billing in a show. Mr. Peabody and his boy, Sherman, are a great example. They sometimes appeared as part of the Rocky and Bullwinkle Show. In this cartoon, Peabody was a dog who wore big round glasses and talked like a professor. He also had a boy named Sherman, which for some odd reason seemed perfectly acceptable to me at the time. Peabody invented a "wayback" machine that he and Sherman would use to travel back in time to witness various historical events. Each time, however, they would discover that things didn't happen the way they were supposed to (such as Paul Revere not being able to make his ride due to only having a statue for a horse instead of a real one), and would subsequently wind up working to fix whatever the problem was (using Peabody's great intellect to do so), so that history would be accurate. Sherman would sometimes make a very stupid pun at the end of the show, thus confirming the intellectual superiority of the dog.

Fractured Fairytales was another "also-ran" on the Bullwinkle Show. I don't feel the need to go into detail here. For most "boomers", that cartoon stands out as one of our all-time favorites. Even the intro song was classic!

But what about the old standards? In my mind, these included Huckleberry Hound, Popeye, Mickey Mouse cartoons and the other Disney classics. But how about Auggie Doggy and Doggy Daddy? Heckle and Jeckel - class clowns of crows? Tom and Jerry, Mighty Mouse, Bugs Bunny or Woody Woodpecker! There was Yogi Bear and Boo-boo, Top Cat, Lippy the Lion and Hardy-har-har. And Road Runner! Are you kidding me?? That was a brilliant cartoon!

I could (and have) gone on for days about old, classic cartoons. The authors must have been frustrated comedy writers whose stuff was a little too sophisticated for Dick VanDyke Show. Anyway, I loved their stuff and wish I had their creative minds! And I realize as I am writing this that I must have watched Milton the Monster with the hope of seeing Fearless Fly. As lame as that Gomer-talking Milton was, Fearless made the show worth watching! With that, I'll bring this post to a close. I still don't know why that song dug its way out to the light of day, but it led to a pleasant trip down memory lane. I did manage to finish the Determination, too! With that, I guess I only have one thing to say.......

JACK ATTACK!!

You know, I really don't mind winter. It's just that it's a season that overstays its welcome. Winter is welcome at my house from Thanksgiving Day until January 1st. At that point, it should take its leave and head back to the North Pole with Rudolph, Frosty the Snowman and Santa.

The tree pictured above sits outside of my office. This is evidence, strangely beautiful as it is, that Jack Frost is rabid. That, or out of winter boredom, he's gone all Andy Warhol on us. I've seen a good, thick frost before, but this is malicious!! Those long, spiky crystals make that sweet little tree look like it's been taken over by a hoard of wooly caterpillars! It's fascinating and beautiful, but let's get on with it! I'm ready for a spring thaw!!

Meet "Sticks"

Yesterday. my sweet, new little granddaughter Sophie turned 1 month old. She is still very tiny and she still sleeps a lot, but as you can see, she took time during her nap to send a little smile to her maw-maw.

She got off to a rocky start. Probably because she was a month early, she became a little jaundiced and had to spend some time in the "tanning bed", as her dad called it. It wasn't long though before she was off and running, and now she's learning all about the joy of livin'!

She caught on right away to relaxin' with daddy on the couch!

She and mama enjoy spending time during the day just visiting and letting big sister Maris practice her picture-taking skills...

Of course, that's when Maris isn't spending time perfecting her championship bowling skills!

She always has time to do a little clowning with her daddy, though......

Sophie has acquired a nickname - "Sticks"... Or, as I've been told, "Twigs", when sister Maris can't remember exactly what it is. I was not thrilled with the nickname at first. Sophie is such a beautiful name and it fits her so well. Sticks sounds more like a name for a back-room pool hustler. She came by it honestly enough; her baby legs are so small and thin, they look like a couple of little sticks.

The more I think about the name though, the more I like it. You can't think of her and say it without smiling! Right now, we're all wondering if the name will 'stick'. I wonder what she'll think of it when she gets older? Can you imagine? First day of school, her teacher smiles and asks "And what is your name?" to which she replies, "Sticks - And don't you forget it!"